A new brother or sister is one of the biggest changes in a child’s life. Excitement, curiosity… and a little fear of no longer being the centre of everything. Stories are a lovely way to talk about all of that without making them feel questioned.
Why stories work
A story lets children talk about feelings through someone else. It’s hard for a child to say “I’m jealous”, but easy to say the dragon in the book is cross because his sister copies everything. From there, the conversation flows.
When to start
- During pregnancy, a few weeks before the birth, so they can imagine what it will be like.
- In the first months, when jealousy appears and the novelty becomes routine.
- When the little one starts crawling and “invading” their toys: prime time for squabbles… and for stories that tell them with humour.
What to look for in a sibling story
- It shows the good and the hard parts. A sibling is a playmate, but also someone who knocks down your towers.
- The older child has an important role. Children need to feel that being the eldest is special.
- There are squabbles and make-ups. They learn that getting cross is normal and can be fixed.
- It’s funny. Laughing at sibling mix-ups takes the weight off.
Questions to talk about after reading
- “Why do you think Draquis got cross?”
- “What did Mipis do to make it better?”
- “Does anything like that ever happen to you?”
- “What’s your favourite thing about being the big brother or sister?”
You don’t need to ask them all, or every time. Sometimes reading and a cuddle is enough.
Ideas to help the older child feel special
- Let them “read” a story to the baby, even if it’s just looking at the pictures.
- A little time alone with you every day, even just ten minutes of storytime.
- Let them choose something for the baby: the pyjamas, the song, the teddy.
- Remind them what they can do that the baby can’t yet: talk, run, read…
When jealousy shows up
Jealousy is normal and healthy. What matters is naming it without scolding: “It looks like you’re cross today because the baby needs mummy a lot. It’s normal to feel like that”. Then plan something just for them.
Draquis & Mipis starts exactly like this: with Draquis watching his little sister hatch from her egg. Then come the jumps, the copying, the squabbles, the SPLASH! in Grumbles’ pond… and the hugs. A perfect family read when a new baby arrives. Meet the characters.